A Godly Relationship vs. a Good Friendship with Your Teen

Hello there!

How you approach parenting will be different from how your parents did, and how other parents do. This month’s Online Parenting video encourages you to consider the difference between parenting teens as their friend, compared to parenting in a way that reflects a godly relationship.

God the Father is the perfect model of a parent. If God is the perfect model of a parent, let’s look at what the Bible says about what is most important to God regarding parenting:

Proverbs 22:6 – “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”

Deuteronomy 6:6–7 – “And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.”

Ephesians 6:4 – “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.”

Proverbs 13:24 – “Whoever spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him.”

Notice what Scripture says. Parents are to “train up” their children, teach God’s Word diligently to their children all the time, bring them up “in the instruction of the Lord,” and love them enough to discipline them. Is this not the heart of God?

God says He disciplines those He loves (Hebrews 12:6), and that those whom He chastens are “blessed” (Psalm 94:12). In Deuteronomy, Moses wrote that “God [disciplines] you just as a man disciplines a son.” Why does God discipline His people? It is out of love for us, so that we might be made holy. It works for our good, so that we reflect God. In the same way, we must parent our kids out of love for them, that they might grow to become more Christ-like.

This is the ultimate reason for disciplining a teen—that they might turn back to a right relationship with God and reflect Him. Yes, it’s harder the older they get. However, parenting in this way really doesn’t leave room for a “friendship” relationship with a parent and their pre-teen or teen. No, this kind of parenting reflects the godly relationship between God and His children.

This is not an easy relationship, but the goal is to raise adults who follow the Lord and His instruction.

I know this is a hard subject, and it’s often difficult, time consuming, and exhausting to discipline, instruct, and teach teenagers. I am praying for you and here for support. I’ve got many resources available if you need more information or counsel. We are on this crazy parenting journey together!

Your Parenting Partner,

Check out this month’s Online Parenting Class.

(Click on the image to open the video link.)

online parenting class


Please let me know if you have any questions, comments, suggestions or problems with these resources!

p.s.  Watch for more help in part 2!